RECONNECT

I was lost and now I am found

This statement is commonly hear during inspirational talk and homily.

The statement emphasizes of success stories of being lost… and afterwards being found.
However, what is the feeling of being lost and found eventually?

Being lost and now found could be fall into the following category: physical, emotional, psychological, and spiritual aspect.

I have been in this moment several times in my life. I experienced being empty and recharged again. Many moments that I am journeying the same moment that I am journeying like before. It happens
repeatedly.

And for that, I am questioning why I am experiencing it all over again and again?
Until I have realized that, I may not finish to see the purpose behind it.
Long time ago, I was hurt inside the community that I am serving with. Challenges came. And it sounds ironically, because I am not okay to interact with the partner given by Him for that mission. I can’t get the reason for a long period of time before.  My priority was my emotions. And I have decided to transfer to another program where is much a little bit away from my previous partner.

Because of that hurt, that kind of passion suddenly lost. I can’t find it. Yes, I have claimed for many years that I am okay. The word “denial” struck me for a long period of time. I searched it, looking for that one more piece to completely say that I am totally okay.

While looking and searching for that missing piece, my service was full of fears, worries, and sometimes wanted to be perfect with a tendency that it should be according to my plans. Yes, you read it right! Sometimes I think that way.

It usually happens, when I was totally lost. When that sanity strikes me! I can’t help it, but sometimes it happens.

But through the grace of the Lord, I am happy and blessed to see that one missing piece.

Last weekend, April 6-7, we had a retreat.

I was the team lead during that time. Lack of personal preparation on my side. I have a lot of thoughts in my mind. I am tired as well from my training. And this retreat, is one of the most challenging retreat ever. But the Lord allowed me to journey on that sweetest moment.

He just maintained that kind of emotions until the day of that retreat. I just surrendered everything. I just prayed that they may experienced a wonderful date with the Lord.

During that day, there were a lot of revisions in the program even the smallest detail of the program like the ice breaker. But I was so amazed because we didn’t feel any anxiousness, but a happy and grateful heart alone.

A pure happy and grateful heart remains until the end of the retreat. I was also happy with the people surrounded us during that time. Because I just saw the joy in service in their faces, and in their hearts.
I just really see God working on them! This was the moment that I forget to see while having an event for the Lord. To be able to see Christ in every individual.

So, what is the key to find that lost piece again? The key, is prayer!!

Prayer is a form of reconnecting to Him. Leaning to His power. Surrendering to Him. Praising Him.
And asking for forgiveness.

Deepening relationship is the key!!!

Relationship with Him, and to individual that God sent for us.